Gaining perspective in the every day
It is great to feel purposeful (but not overloaded), balanced, well and strong in our working lives. Sometimes however there can be a range of tasks, people and priorities, jostling for our attention and we can slip out of this balanced mindset – and when we feel overwhelmed, it can be hard to shift from worry (about the future) or rumination (about the past).
A first good step is to calm our physical state a little – breathing (box breathing or ‘sigh’ breathing are both great, with an evidence base) and tuning in to our bodies and our surroundings, as can a hot/cold drink, walking, going outside, and even slowly washing our hands.
Another strategy that can be helpful is to shift perspective. In his new book, Prof Marc Brackett from Yale University (Founding Director of the Center for Emotional Intelligence) suggests we can shift in time ‘in two weeks/months/years from now, how much will this matter?’; in viewpoint (distanced self talk) – speaking to ourselves in the third person can help here ‘Mel, you can do this!’; and in space – imagining you are an observer, watching what’s going on projected onto a movie screen or from a balcony. I find chatting things through with a supportive colleague or loved one, and moving on to another preferred activity to gain some space can be other worthwhile ways to allow new perspectives to emerge.
Importantly, these aren’t prescriptive, but can be worth playing with to see if they can help shift out of overwhelm in the moment. Being kind to ourselves as we try new things is important too, especially if we are tired and stressed – as is celebrating our success if we can shift things up a little!
References:
Brackett, M. (2025). Dealing with Feeling: Use Your Emotions to Create the Life You Want. Celadon Books.
(Contact Melinda for further references about perspective).
Melinda Phillips, Director/Principal Psychologist at Compassionate Schools.
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